The Stormcock Community

We’d tell our mums we were off, in the mornings. Me and my mates. We’d pack a bag, full of sandwiches. Peanut butter was my favourite. Peanut butter sarnies and a bottle of pop. No peanut allergies back then! Full of E numbers and we’d trot off into the country. Not a care in the world - just had to be back in time for tea.

 

Simone             And I expect the summers were longer, too?

 

Dave                Well, they were, weren’t they? I’m not kidding! Didn’t they seem longer to you?

 

Simone             No, you just spent more time out, back then. You just think they were longer.

 

Dave                We’d go off for miles. Down the back roads and past the heath. We’d stop off, at the stream and swing on the rope someone had put up, on a tree. Swinging over the stream, daring each other to go out further and further. I remember one time. Hanging too low, on the swing. I held my legs out in front of me and smacked right into a boulder. Whacked my coccyx. I couldn’t move. I just sat there in the water. My mates laughed. They didn’t realise how much pain I was in. It knocked the wind right out of me.

 

Simone             Not entirely without risks, then?

 

Dave                No, but those were the types of knocks all kids suffer from growing up. Another time, we rode out further than we ever had before. A long way, and we came to a ford.

 

Simone             A ford?

 

Dave                Where the stream crosses the road. There was this footbridge.

 

Simone             And?

 

Dave                We took it in turns to ride through as fast as we possibly could. It was my turn. I took a run up, gathering speed. I was going at top speed. The water was only a few inches deep. I hit the water at a funny angle and my bike just went from under me. I went one way and the bike went another. We didn’t have helmets back then!

 

Simone             What happened? Were you hurt?

 

Dave                Luckily I wasn’t. But it scared me. I was soaked but it was a warm sunny day. We waited, just throwing stones in the water as I dried out. Then this family walked on by.

 

Simone             A family?

 

Dave                They must have walked miles. We were in the middle of nowhere.

 

Simone             Unless they had just parked up nearby?

 

Dave                Maybe. I hadn’t thought of it like that.

 

Simone             What about them, anyway?

 

Dave                Oh, nothing really. Just, there they were. Mum, dad. Grandma, I think, by the looks of the older woman. Then some kids. A girl - about sixteen, and a boy, a bit younger, I think. She had a cheesecloth blouse on and denim shorts. When they all got to the ford they started splashing each other. Soaking them. All laughing. No one minded getting wet. God - at one point, we even thought she - the girl - was going to take her blouse off. We nearly died!

 

Simone             Perverts!

 

Dave                It wasn’t like that. It was just schoolboy stuff. In our dreams, maybe. But I always remembered it. That day. Even when there was danger, it didn’t feel bad. Do you think many families go out walking with their kids now? Did you, ever?

 

Simone             Not much. I always kept myself pretty much to myself.

 

Dave                I wonder what happened to them. That family. I wonder what they’re all doing now. If they remember those days too? Where did you used to go as a kid then?

 

Simone             I’d ride, too. But to this little cemetery. It was quiet. I’d read.

 

Dave                That’s morbid, isn’t it?

 

Simone             It was peaceful. I’d lie back listening to the birds. Watch the clouds. Blue skies. I liked it.

 

Dave                Didn’t you have many friends?

 

Simone             Sure I did. I just liked my own company too.

 

Dave                I like mine as well. I’d like to go back.

 

Simone             To the stream?

 

Dave                No. To those days. When I was younger. Sometimes I wish I could take that kid to one side.

 

Simone             Who, the girl?

 

Dave                No, me! Sometimes I wish I could take me to one side and give myself some good advice.

 

Simone             Advice? What would you say?

 

Dave                I don’t know, really. Maybe tell myself to just enjoy these days. Make the most of them. One day, they’ll all be over. Keep hold of the memories, because at the end of it all, that’s all you’ll have. Memories.

 

Simone             You’re being extremely maudlin, Dave. You make it sound like all the good days are over.

 

Dave               I know that’s not true. Just, when you get older you’ve got to get on with the business of life. Back then it was just about living. Carefree, wasn’t it? None of the crap that adulthood brings. I never realised what my parents had to give up to give me all that. Now I have a better understanding I’ve got a greater respect for them. For it.

 

Simone           That’s nice then, isn’t it? See, it’s not just about lies, is it? Sometimes it’s about protecting your kids from the truth. You don’t need to know everything, do you? Maybe there’s nothing you could tell that kid. Have you ever thought about that?

 

Dave                I have. I think maybe I just want to put a hand on his shoulder. Tell him he’s alright.

 

Simone             Even if you could, it wouldn’t work, would it?

 

Dave                What do you mean?

 

Simone            You’d have to run away from him, wouldn’t you?

 

Dave                 Run away?

 

Simone             From the stranger!

 

                        (Pause)

 

                        Do you still want to make that telephone call?

 

Dave                No. I’ll leave it for now.

 

                        (The speaker’s whine and pop. Christina Aguilera’s “Genie in a Bottle” plays for a few bars).

 

                         It’s ironic, in a way.

 

Simone           What is?

 

Dave                All this talk of safety and safety gear.

 

Simone            Why’s that then?

 

Dave                Because of what I ended up in.

 

Simone           Safety?

 

Dave               You asked me if this suitcase summed up my life. What if I opened this case? Would you know the real Dave?

 

Simone             Well? Would we?

 

Dave                It’s all in here. The sum total of Dave. All in this little case. Nothing too exciting really. Just my samples. “Evans Health and Safety Wear”. There’s me banging on about helmets and kneepads – guess what’s in here?

 

Simone             Astound me. Helmets and kneepads?

 

Dave                Nearly right! Safety-wear, for sure. Ear defenders, eye goggles, overalls. “Safety in the workplace is our business”. That’s where I was going. To launch our latest most exciting and innovative range of work wear. And you can have any logo of your choice, on the breast pocket. Pretty damn sexy, huh?

 

Simone             Someone has to do it, I suppose. It’s all in there, is it?

 

Dave                Just some of the range. We’ve just improved our fire retardant overalls with new lines and a new exciting catalogue. Funny how even the most boring things get called exciting when they’re trying to flog them.

 

Simone             It’s all about marketing, isn’t it? They could hardly be honest about it, could they? Here’s our new range of “Functional Utilitarian Work Wear” doesn’t quite have a ring to it, does it?

 

Dave                No!

 

Simone             Do I get to see the real Dave then? Are you going to open the case and show me this exciting range of fashionable accessories for the workingman?

 

Dave                You don’t want to see this, believe me!

 

Simone             Go on – just humour me. Pretend I’m your client. “Schmooze” me.

 

Dave                (He unclips the suitcase)

 

                        What do we have here then?

 

                        (Dave pulls out a cotton bag)

 

This is a con for a start. See this lovely cotton bag? That’s just for the samples. First thing you’ll get is a nice polythene bag, and don’t forget to keep it away from children and pets!

 

Simone             Of course – not to mention suicidal insomniacs with a handful of pills! Carry on, sir!

 

Dave                And out of this utility bag, I produce our most cutting-edge fire retardant overalls, madam! I present to you the Mark IV version of our “Flame Boy Overall”!

 

                        (Dave unfolds a set of bright orange flame retardant overalls)

 

                        Pretty, eh?

 

Simone           Practical is the word I’d use.

 

Dave               There aren’t many words for it, is there? They do try, down in marketing, to sex these things up. When it boils down to it, overalls are just overalls aren’t they? Well, there you have it – my life, in a bag.

 

Simone             Put them on!

 

                        (Simone takes a photograph)

 

                        Go on – I could use some of these in a feature.

 

Dave                What, these? Don’t be daft.

 

Simone           Really. Go on - put them on. Don’t be shy. It’s what I do. The right picture - in the wrong place. You haven’t got anything to lose.

 

Dave                Nothing to gain either. It’s silly.

 

Simone             No, it isn’t. This is just the right setting. An empty waiting room. Put them on, Dave.

 

Dave                You’re serious, aren’t you?

 

Simone             Deadly. No one need know. Put them on.

 

Dave                But – the pictures? You’ll have them?

 

Simone             And no one will see them. Leastways, not your face. Are you going to put them on, or not?

 

                        (Dave hesitates, and then unfolds the overalls. He removes his jacket and shoes then slips the overalls on)

 

Dave                How do you want me?