The Stormcock Community

Scene 4

Int. classroom. Day One. Afternoon

Helen is with her class. She looks at her clock - it's 3pm.

HELEN   Right. I like to end each day by reading a book.

[They look excited] Before I start, can anyone tell me the name of a good story writer?

All hands shoot up.

HELEN   Emma.

EMMA   Joanne Rowling

HELEN   Good. Anyone else? Tom?

TOM  J.K.Rowling

HELEN   Ye-es that's the same person isn't it? Any other good story writers?

They all look puzzled except Madonna. She puts her arm up.

HELEN   Madonna

MADONNA   The lady who writes Harry Potter.

HELEN   Right. Yes. Pattern emerging now. Ok, let's try something else. Can anyone tell me the name of a good book?

All hands go up.

Without the name Harry Potter in the title?

All hands go down except for Simon's.

Simon

SIMON   'Quidditch Through the Ages'

HELEN   Excellent. That's perfect. Well you'll be pleased to know that the book I'm going to read is all about a young wizard.

They excitedly whisper "It's Harry Potter".

Called the 'Wizard of Earthsea'

She holds the book up. The children groan. We hear a 'not Harry Potter'.

HELEN   No, not Harry Potter.

The class groan.

But another boy wizard who goes to wizard school, has all sorts of exciting adventures and learns spells.

They're not interested.

And finally meets Harry Potter.

They all sit up excitedly.

HELEN   [To cam]  OK. He doesn't. But he will in my version.

[Starts reading] "It was on the Island of Roke in the middle of Earthsea that a boy named Ged was born"

EMMA   When does he meet Harry?

HELEN   Later!

SCENE 5 

Int.the classroom. Day One. A bit later.

Helen is putting up work on the classroom wall - maps of the world which they have coloured in and labelled. She looks at the clock - it's 3.30. Madonna has stayed behind and comes up.

MADONNA   Miss Milton

HELEN   Yes Madonna

MADONNA   Emma says you're going to send me to the bogeyman because I'm a bit thick.

HELEN   [Sympathetic] Oh Madonna, that's rubbish with a capital R. I only send naughty children to the bogeyman, not thick ones, so you've nothing to worry anbout.

[Realises] .... not that you're thick anyway. You have a lot to offer and anyone who says you're thick is triple thick with added thickness.

MADONNA   My mum says I'm thick. Is she triple th_

HELEN   Except your mum, obviously. You are not thick - as this super map of the world you've done clearly shows....why have you made the sea all red?

She shows Madonna the map with the seas coloured red and all the land coloured green.

MADONNA   You told us to. You said put in the red sea.

HELEN   Right. Right. Yes. Hence all the green land as well. Actually the Red sea's not a colour it's a name.

[Pointing to the map] It's the name of this little sea here.

MADONNA   Next to France.

HELEN  No. Next to - well yes, next to France on your map, but that should be Egypt.. France should be over there where you've got China.

MADONNA   Sorry Miss Milton.

HELEN   No, no. Don't be sorry. I should have explained it better. Tell you what.

[Rubbing out and writing in] If we just change these few names around. Like so. Very clever of you to write the names in pencil so I can rub them out.

MADONNA   I had to - I was chewing my pen and I swallowed the nib.

HELEN   Right. So, like I say, if we just change these round - then voila! It's good enough to go up on the wall.

[Pinning it up] Have you had work on the wall before?

MADONNA [Shakes her head]  I've not been in this room before.

HELEN  No, no. I mean up on any wall?

[Madonna shakes her head again] Well you have now. And if anyone asks you why the sea's all red just say shark attacks.

<TBC..>